Dear fathers who sit in the back row of the cry room,
I have a small favor to ask of you. Could you please not sit in the very back of the room? Because a mother might have been hoping to have a bit of privacy there.
You might have noticed said mother as she darted into the room in the middle of the Gospel reading. She might have had a wild look in her eyes, a combination of surprise, panic, and slight appall that this baby, who had sat quietly through every Sunday mass she had ever been to (a grand total of 8), had suddenly started crying!
Maybe you could tell she was a new mom and had never set foot in this room before. You might have even chuckled to yourself to see her attempt to go back into the main sanctuary once the baby calmed down, only to came dashing back a few minutes later, screaming baby in tow.
You might have noticed her stealing furtive glances around the room. I can assure you that she was not judging the ages of your children or their snacks and juice boxes. She was more than likely desperately seeking some cover.
You see, this mother might be ruing the day she chose not to use a pacifier. She might be realizing that even though her baby isn't hungry (having been fed right before coming to church), the only way to quiet her will be to nurse. She might be freaking out that her nursing cover is tucked neatly away in her diaper bag, which is sitting back in the pew underneath her husband, who is himself trying to figure out whether he's supposed to stay in place or come join his flustered wife.
She might finally reason to herself that you have kids, so it's not like you've never seen a mother nurse before. She will appreciate that you shift over so she has room to sit between you in the single open space in the middle of the back row. She will also appreciate that you avoid looking at her, while other mothers in the room send her sympathetic glances. She will be extremely grateful that you seem not to notice her hurriedly shoving a nipple in her baby's mouth.
All this anxiety could have been mitigated, however, if you had been sitting just one row up. So perhaps next time you could consider leaving the back row vacant for neurotic new moms. I assure you they would highly appreciate it.
Sincerely,
The crying room rookie