The Green Room

Before you buy it...

I have been on a quest for many, many months now to improve my wardrobe. Along the way, I was very inspired by this shopping guide, so much so that I actually printed it out, folded it up, and carried it around in my purse for several months. The only problem? It was actually too cute to use. So I didn't.

But I knew I needed something to help me from succumbing to sales racks that would refill my pared-down closet with so-so items. So I researched. I checked out style books from the library (although you can't tell it by looking at me) and for weeks and even months I contemplated what was important when I was buying clothes.

For most of my life, the main question I've asked myself when clothes shopping has been How much does it cost? Last fall I went in a new direction, asking myself Is it pretty? As it turned out, neither of those questions are really helpful to me. I habitually overfocus on price, looking at the sales tag before I even consider how much I actually like an item. And many of the clothes that I think are pretty are simply not practical when I'm diving headfirst after my toddler down a dirty enclosed slide at the playground.

There are other questions that are extremely helpful, though. Here are the questions that I have found most useful when clothes shopping:

Do you love it, or do you love the price tag? This is the most important question I have to face! There are so many clothes out there that I only like with price tags that I love. But this does not make for a happy closet. Only clothes that I truly love should make the cut.

Is it a good color for you? I've read several pieces of advice on colors, from choosing just a few flattering favorites to finding your "season." I have decided that I will only buy clothes in the three colors that I like and are good for me... but that doesn't include neutrals. So really at this point my range of colors to buy includes pink, purple, blue, white, black, brown, navy, and tan. That's a lot of colors when I write it out.

While predetermining colors can be helpful, the most important thing I know about color is that I look awful in orange. So if I'm looking for, say, a red shirt, this question reminds me to stay far, far away from the orange-based reds and to veer towards the reds with a more purplish undertone. The color must be good for you personally!

Can you make at least two outfits from it? This is another tough one, but is important when trying to keep your closet from exploding. If it's a top, can you pair it with both jeans and a skirt that you already own? If it's a bottom, can you think of at least two (preferably more) shirts that you can wear with it? Two is a bare minimum. I've read places that up the number to a hard and fast three, but I have a hard time with that sometimes. If it's a shirt that I know I will wear all the time with jeans, and perhaps occasionally with a casual skirt, I go ahead and get it. If I find a top that goes with three or more bottoms (like a recent white top I got that I can wear with jeans, khaki shorts, a red skirt, and a navy skirt), I get really excited. REALLY excited.

That excitement of finding a great piece of clothing is what we're going for.

Check the tag - can you wash it? No seriously, look at the tag. I will almost never lay something flat to dry, and rarely hang something to dry. And hand-washing is a complete joke. If I am unlikely to wash the item, I am unlikely to wear it. If you are better at caring for your clothes than I am, I certainly commend you. Go ahead and get that dry clean only dress. I know myself, though, and items like that are better left on the rack.

Is it well made? Unfortunately so much clothing out there is cheaply made, it's hard to avoid. (The fact that it's usually cheap to buy is a small consolation.) However, if there are obvious issues - loose buttons, seams not lying flat, strings hanging, etc. - you're better off not purchasing it. Because even if you are going to fix the button that fell off, it will take you a month or more to get around to it (or at least it will me). Try to pass up those clothes that are clearly poorly made.

Is it flattering to your figure? Your figure is not a number on the scale but your general proportions. You've heard of the apple shape, pear shape, etc. Figure out which one you are, remember it, and buy clothes that suit it.

I read one stylist who recommended that you take a picture of yourself in all your outfits to really be able to see how you look in something. I tried it a few times and was amazed at how different it was to look directly in a mirror and to look at a picture of myself in a mirror. It really did clarify some aspects of my figure for me, so if you're still confused, try that.

Here are a few examples that are less about figure and more about particular items, but they revealed things to me that I didn't notice by just looking in the mirror.

Cankle alert! My beloved boots make my legs look fat under skirts!

... but they look good under jeans.

Oh, where to begin. Too tight cardigan plus buttoned sleeves equals football player pads. My shoulders are already fairly broad so I want to tone those down. And those shoes. No wonder my husband makes a face every time I pull them out - combined with that skirt, they make my calves look ginormous!

I know it's blurry, but I was so excited to discover that this sweater tricks your eye into thinking I have an actual waist!

Will you still like it two years from now? For those of us in our childbearing years, there are going to be periods where we aren't wearing our "normal" clothes. Like, a year or more, by the time you get through the pregnancy and postpartum weight fluctuations. Last August I wanted to buy some summer shorts on clearance, but I really had to contemplate whether that was wise - I was hoping to be visibly pregnant by the following summer, so I had to think ahead to the summer after that. It was 2011 - would I still want those shorts in 2013 as a postpartum mother of two? (This is unfortunately not an announcement.) It's not so much thinking exactly two years in advance - you may have a child sooner or later than that - as it is not getting caught up in a trend that will make you look so last year/two years ago/three years ago the next time you pull it out. Think classic styles that you are confident you'll wear for years.

Can you nurse in it? Can you wrangle toddlers in it? Pull the top up and down. Bend over. Be realistic.

Sometimes I'm thrilled to discover a cute top has enough stretch to be really breastfeeding-friendly. That elasticity may not be so great if you have a toddler constantly pulling on your shirt.

Would you still want it if it cost twice as much? I'm not asking whether you would buy it, but whether you would want it. I had to include this question at the end to keep my cost-obsessed self honest. I still head straight for the sales rack, and that's not an inherently bad thing. But if I had seen an item at the front of the store for twice as much, would I have immediately oohed over it or not have given it a second look? I need to apply the same criteria to the bargain racks.

Do you really love it? A final keep-me-honest question. If I get this far in the list, I probably do. If I'm hesitating, I probably don't. I can always go home and come back for it if I find myself still daydreaming about it a few days later. If it's gone, it wasn't meant to be.

I printed this list out, laminated it with contact paper, and carry it around in my wallet. Yes, I pull it out in the dressing room. It only takes a minute or two, and I'm usually only halfway through the list by the time I know whether I'm going to buy the item.

[I'm not sure if the jpeg above will download at the right size for you to print out as well (roughly 2.2 inches wide and 3.2 inches high). If not and you'd like it, I'd be glad to send you the original powerpoint slide so you can print out your own wallet-sized copy. Just shoot me an email at thatmarriedcouple at gmail dot com.]

A word of warning: I almost titled this post "How to suck all the fun out of shopping." The first couple times I used this list of questions, I was disappointed to be leaving the store empty-handed. I was passing up such good deals, and isn't part of the fun of shopping to be finding and impulsively buying those amazing bargains?! I was being so darn practical and it was no fun at all. Now that I'm used to it, though, I find this list to be very freeing. It is not a good deal if I'm spending money on something that I don't love - it's a waste. Yes, I am buying fewer clothes. But I actually love them. And that makes it worth it.